Need You Now

The song “Need You Now” by Plumb has been making me cry lately when it comes on the radio.  Especially the parts about needing the strength to “just keep breathing” and “standing on a road I didn’t plan”.  Boy, is this a different road than I thought I was headed down!  I was just telling my friend how sometimes I get a moment where I feel outside of my situation and it’s like “Did this really happen to me?  Is this really my life?”  It can feel so strange and surreal.  It is not the road I want to be on, but it is where I am.  And sometimes it is all I can do to just keep breathing.  After a recent post on Facebook, several people wrote comments about how strong I am.  I really am not strong.  I have always been overly sensitive and take everything to heart.  I have joked in the past that I’m like a snail without a shell who feels every poke and can be easily squashed.  I’m a big, pink squishy mollusk.  It is strange to me that people think I’m strong.  I guess because Luke died and I continue to live?  It is not me being strong in myself, but God holding me up.  He is carrying me right now. I wish He could take it away like the song says, but I’m thankful He’s with me on this road.  I know that when I get to heaven, this pain will be taken away and I will hold my Luke.  I don’t know how people get through this without Him.  Here are the lyrics to the song:

“Need You Now (How Many Times)” by Plumb

Well, everybody’s got a story to tel.l And everybody’s got a wound to be healed. I want to believe there’s beauty here. ‘Cause oh, I get so tired of holding on. I can’t let go, I can’t move on. I want to believe there’s meaning here.
How many times have you heard me cry out “God please take this”? How many times have you given me strength to Just keep breathing? Oh I need you God, I need you now.
Standing on a road I didn’t plan. Wondering how I got to where I am. I’m trying to hear that still small voice. I’m trying to hear above the noise.
How many times have you heard me cry out “God please take this”? How many times have you given me strength to Just keep breathing? Oh I need you God, I need you now.
Though I walk, Though I walk through the shadows. And I, I am so afraid. Please stay, please stay right beside me. With every single step I take.
How many times have you heard me cry out? And how many times have you given me strength?
How many times have you heard me cry out “God please take this”? How many times have you given me strength to Just keep breathing? Oh I need you God, I need you now.
I need you now Oh I need you God, I need you now. I need you now I need you now
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