Please Include Luke in Christmas

I wrote the email below to my family in the hopes that it’s okay to tell them more specifically what I would like as far as Luke and remembering him at holidays.  I’m sharing it because I see a lot of other blog posts about desiring that our families remember our babies this holiday.  Maybe we just need to tell them that we need this or what we might want it to look like?  I’m not sure, but I thought I’d try.  This was a stretch for me because I hate anything that might make people uncomfortable and I generally avoid “touchy” subjects.

(Sent to my mom, dad, sister and husband)

Bethany made an ornament for Luke to put on her Christmas tree and wrote about it on her blog and FB.  She also sent me this other ornament for him in the picture I attached (which I already showed Mom.)  I love this so much, how she talks about Luke and includes him in things.  She wrote me that her sons got excited about Luke’s ornament and they love talking about him playing with their sister Lucy in heaven.  They are the same boys who spelled Luke’s name with bathtub toys in that FB post I showed you months ago.  They include Luke all the time.  I want us to do this somehow too please.  I wanted him to be mentioned in the Thanksgiving prayer and when mom said she was thankful because “we are all here!” it stung a little bit because what was most on my mind was who was missing.  I know nothing bad was meant by it, but I did not feel like everyone was there.  Can we please include Luke in Christmas somehow?  I want him to forever be a part of our family.  Because he is.

Love,
Sara
 Luke orn
Let’s hope it helps!
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8 thoughts on “Please Include Luke in Christmas

  1. Sara, that was an awesome idea! It is a good way to let them know how you feel. Hopefully they can help with ideas on how to include Luke!

  2. Great letter and also a great idea!! I so badly want my family to recognize and talk about Aj. I hate that it feels like his death is a shameful secret. I hope that I can gain the courage to step up and tell my family what I need this holiday season.

  3. I’ve given up on my husband’s family. Mine is wonderful, but sadly the attitude here appears to be that we should over it, and that I should just be grateful for what I have.

    So I’m not going.

    • Sure. So far, I haven’t gotten any replies even though it’s been about a week, I think. My mom and sister don’t check email much, but I think my dad does? I rarely get any emails or replies to emails from them though. In fact, I can’t think of any I’ve gotten. I’ll let you know what happens…

  4. Your letter is lovely. Written directly from your heart. If they don’t reply via e-mail, I hope by Christmas time they will respect your wishes and include Luke. He is apart of you and will always be.

    Thinking of you…

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