So I would say the letter to my family about my desire for Luke to be included in Christmas was a success.  They didn’t reply to the email or say anything directly about it, which is typical (not because they’re mean or anything, they don’t really reply to emails), but they did take it to heart.  It was not a bad day, although it did of course include sadness.  I cried for a few minutes in the closet mid-day.  Some of the day was a little blurry for me.  I couldn’t remember what presents I got the next day.  But we had some good family time, nice meals and thoughtful gifts.  When my dad said the prayer before dinner, he didn’t mention Luke by name, but he said, “It’s been a hard year…” and I appreciated that.  Before they left, my mom said she hoped I had a good day.  Then she said, “Well, you got through it” and I cried a little while she gave me a long hug.  It was nice to have that element of the day acknowledged.

Here are the ways that they included Luke in the day:

My mom had asked what she might sew me for Christmas gifts.  I said a stocking for Luke with his name on it and some pajama pants.  Here is Luke’s stocking.  My mom made a big point of giving it to me on Christmas eve, even though that meant opening it in the parking lot of church after the candlelight service and it was freezing.  I assume she wanted it to be hung before Christmas morning, which was nice.


My sister had a present for me to open on Christmas eve too.  She gave us this candle.  It’s a little hard to read in the picture, but it says “Luke’s light never fades in heaven.”  She said she thought we could light it on holidays as a way of having him with us.  She said she thought for like 5 days about what to put on it and she hoped it was good.  I loved the gesture to include him.


This was my favorite gift.  I had mentioned to my sister that I wanted a piece to add to my Luke necklace with his hand and/or footprint on it.  I had seen it on etsy.  She told me she wanted to get it for me for Christmas and asked me to email her a link of my favorite one.  It’s real silver and it’s an imprint of his actual handprint.  I love it.  It feels nice to rub his little hand and have it close to my heart.


So, friends, we have survived Christmas, the first one for many of us.  Good job!  I hope you had blessings in your day.  It’s almost a new year and I am glad for that!


8 thoughts on “Christmas

    • Sorry it took me awhile to answer. When I last looked, the link I had followed wasn’t currently on there ,but the shop that makes the one I got is called “Say What” creations. The artist’s name is Sarah. I just did a search for custom handprint necklace and that’s how I found it. There were several others that looked pretty good too.

    • I am so glad your family came through for you. There wasn’t a lot of mention of Caleb that I remember. My mom got me a necklace with his birthstone and told me it was my gift from Caleb. I also put up a tree decorated in snowflakes in his memory (it snowed the day he was born.) Sometimes people really need to hear what you need from them.

  1. Glad that your Xmas turned out ok. I wish I would have done the same and sent an email to my family. No one has included our little girl, or gave us some gift for her…there was just one friend that wish ‘happy xmas to the three of you’ and he touched deeply my heart. Next time I will do as you. I need my girl’s name to be spoken by her relatives. Thanks for your blog, it is like walking side by side this difficult path. Happy 2014.

  2. I am so glad that your family included Luke into your Christmas. I love the necklace and Luke’s handprint! I often find myself rubbing Jonah’s footprints too. Maybe I will get his footprints added to my necklace. But what a beautiful way to carry him with you 🙂

  3. I’m so glad you made decisions that felt right for you and that your family acknowledged your beautiful baby this holiday season…I especially think the handprint frame and candle were so thoughtful and unique! Hugs to you for a happy new year… here’s looking to brighter days!

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